Establishing Your Identity: The One and Only You (Part 2 of 2)

Sunday, June 13, 2010

“There could never be a more beautiful you
Don’t buy the lies disguises and hoops they make you jump through
You were made to fill a purpose that only you could do
So there could never be a more beautiful you” -Jonny Diaz Lyrics

Buzz Lightyear: “No, Woody you were right all along. I’m not a Space Ranger, I’m just a toy; a stupid insignificant toy.”

Woody: “Wait a minute. Being a toy is a lot better than being a Space Ranger.”

Buzz Lightyear: “Yeah, right.”

Woody:“No, it is! Look over in that house there is a kid who thinks you’re the greatest, and it’s not because you’re a Space Ranger, pal, it’s because you’re a toy. You are his toy.”

Buzz Lightyear: “But why would Andy want me?” 

Woody:”Why would Andy want you? Look at you! You’re a Buzz Lightyear! Any other toy would give up his moving parts just to be you! You’ve got wings, you glow in the dark, you talk, you’re helmet does that whoosh thing, you are a cool toy!!”

A lot can be taken away from this short scene that corresponds to us as Christians dealing with our identity. First, just like Buzz, we convince ourselves that being someone else other than what we really are makes us more significant. Also we struggle to come to grips with why being human is so special, what separates us from the rest of creation? Finally, we wrestle with why God would want us in the first place. Why would the creator the universe whose full of infinite wisdom, grace, power, and love ever want to use us for His glory and love us more than we can possibly imagine? The answer lies in what each of one of us possesses: a special unique set of talents, abilities, personalities, gifts, experiences, and story that only you have. There is no one is history like you. Not before, not now, not in the pages of recorded history yet to be written. You are the only you! There’s a reason why God gave us all a one of a kind fingerprint that no one else has–to display how truly special you are in His eyes! Before we look into why we need to establish our identity, let’s go over the wrong approaches in grasping our identity in Christ and how our society views identity.  

Our society is obsessed with conformity. From TV ads, to magazines, to celebrity look-a-likes we want to be like someone else. They tell us you’ve got to be like Kobe Bryant, Miley Cyrus, Zac Efron, Tom Brady; look like a certain supermodel, or sing like the latest American Idol winner. This train of thought has trickled into all aspects of society from the food to eat, to the clothes we wear, to the technological gadgets we carry around. Being you just isn’t good enough; so we strive to find happiness by being someone else. Sadly, this kind of thinking has largely impacted the church as well. Instead of being unique and finding new, creative ways to approach being the hands and feet of Christ, churches now look at the big, booming churches. Success is measured by how many are in attendance or by how similar are worship programs and sermons are to what everyone else is doing.  Conformity is now the big drawing card to which we reach for in America and it’s beginning to rear its ugly head.

The first main reason we struggle with our identity is we pretend to be someone else. God doesn’t ask us to be Billy Graham, Rick Warren, King David, Josh Groban, Beth Moore, or any other lofty figure we look up to. Pretending to be someone we’re not is hard work and leaves us frustrated, tired, and defeated. That’s why we feel tired after a job interview, a first date, in the accompany of a new friend, or on the first day of school when we feel like we need to project an image for someone else. You have to start being honest with yourself, God created you to be you and no one else.

The comparison game also is a wrong approach to our identity. Comparison is a killer to spiritual growth. We think we should be like someone else because they’re more successful, popular, and happy than we are. We’re at odds with what we think we should be with what God made us to be. As Henri Houwen wrote: “Spiritual greatness has nothing to do with being greater than others. It has everything to do with being as great as each of us can be.” Your false self is an illusion of misplaced pride, ego, and neediness.  God made you to want his plan for your life not out of obligation!  Comparison leads to either feeling prideful about what we have that others don’t, or shameful on what others have that we don’t–and neither does us any good.

The third reason is wanting to become what everyone else wants you to become. Everyone wants you to change: TV networks want you to watch more television, your boss wants you to be more productive, credit card companies want you to be more in debt, stores want your business, and restaurants want you to eat more of their food. Everybody has an agenda for you and has a specific role they want you to play. When we live to please others, we’re in bondage and freedom is impossible to obtain. You have to be willing to disappoint people sometimes; because  nobody knows the true you except God. Even you can’t tell yourself how to fully become the person who were meant to be, because you didn’t create yourself. God knows what the best version of you looks like and is already working to make it happen in your life.

Finally the fear of failure of becoming what we were meant hinders how we look at our identity. The failure to thrive instead of just survive paralyzes us to the core. The largest mental health problem of our day is not depression or anxiety–but a loss of hope and meaning. This is other known as languishing. It’s the absence of mental and emotional vitality. Our dreams over time fade away, we give up on growing and living our life’s purpose and lose our will to live. As St. Irenaeus said: “The glory of God is a human being fully alive; and to be alive consists in beholding God.“  Perhaps it’s time we stop relying on our own strength and power to become the person we were meant to be and instead turn to the one that knows best–God.

So, why do we struggle so much in establishing our identity? It’s because we sometimes fail to remember who we belong to. In the Disney animation classic, Lion King, we can again see how a fantasy world with talking animals gives us an illustration of reality. Simba, who is the true heir to the throne of the animal kingdom, is falsely blamed for the death of his dad, Mufasa. Simba runs away in fear and guilt, giving up on his dream to one day be king. Then one day Mufasa appears to him in a vision and the following interaction takes place:

Mufasa: “Simba, you have forgotten me.”

Simba: But Dad, how could I ever forgotten you?”

Mufasa: “You have forgotten who you are, and therefore you have forgotten me. Remember who you are. You are my child, the one true king.”

In the same way, God says to us: “Remember who you are. You are my child. You are the child of the King.” The reason so many people barely cease to exist is because we have forgotten the one we belong to. As C.S. Lewis put it, “There is no neutral ground in the universe, every square inch, every split second is claimed by God and counterclaimed by Satan.” This doubt of who we are and who God truly is can be seen in the song, “What You Want” by Caedmon’s Call:  ”The lie’s always cheaper than the truth, But the lie’s all I’ve ever known of you,  Maybe none of this is true..But I’m not what you want, No, I’m not anyone, But if you needed me, Then I could be someone.” When we don’t trust God to use us from His purposes and accept that lie that He doesn’t want to use for His glory, it’ll leave us paralazed to move forward. God wants to reclaim you and to do this we must recognize that this astonishing fact—the God of the universe created you, loves you, and wants to claim you! It is when we come to realize and understand this, that we can begin to grasp what purpose and plan God has in store for us.

Your life is no accident, it is no fluke of nature, God thought of you long before time began. It was not luck, chance, or coincidence–it’s for His purpose and glory that you exist. Every natural talent, personality trait, and passion you possess was determined for a specific reason by God. As the Bible says: “For you created me in my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that fully well.” Psalm 139:13, 14. God’s motive for creating you was His love. The reason for creating the world was because of you. Everything in the world was fine tuned just to make life on earth possible. God doesn’t just show love or possess love for you–He is love! Love is the essence of God’s character. God didn’t need to create you, He had perfect fellowship and love in the Trinity. But He wanted to make you in order to express His love. This is where our identity begins, knowing that God loves us and has a plan for our lives! “He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.” (James 1:18)

You are a masterpiece created by the Grand Master of the universe whose attention to detail and interest in His creation far outweigh any artist you will ever meet. The Bible states, “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so that we can do the good things He planned for us long ago.” (Ephesians 2:10, NLT). Self-help books say to look within to discover the life you were meant to live, but the key to this discovery is not looking within, but looking to God.  Once you discover who you are, it is then you can discover what you were meant to do. Christian artist Steven Curtis Chapman captured God’s heart for us in his song “Treasure of You” which states:  ”So take a look in the mirror in the light of the truth, Oh, yes it’s true , See there’s nothing more you can say or do, God loves the way He created you!” You are a masterpiece, a divine work of art, a treasure waiting to be discovered!  One more thing we need to keep in mind concerning oour identity is this:

One of the greatest lies our society that is commonly used is this: “You can be anything you want to be.” If God made you uniquely–the one and only you–can you really be anything you want to be? If you’re reserved in nature, can you become a public speaker? If you aren’t fast, can you become a Olympic track runner? If you don’t have an appreciation for kids, can you really become a kindergarten teacher?  Maybe, but you’re have to work much harder, deal with much frustration, and be left with an incredible sense of dissatisfaction with what you’re doing. The question instead we should ask ourselves is this: Can I be everything God wants me to be? The answer of course is–Yes! Erik Rees, author of S.H.A.P.E. states this in regards to why we were created: “You were not created to conform. You were not created to compare. You were not created to compete. You were not created to compromise. You were created to contribute to God’s kingdom and make a significant difference with your life. You were created to just be you!” Be the best you, because you’re the only you the world will ever see!

Once you establish these important implications, you’ll begin to grasp that God made you to flourish. Flourishing is God’s plan for you, and when you flourish you are in harmony with God, other people, creation, and yourself. Flourishing means moving toward God’s best version of you. As you grow with the help of God, you will change, but you will always be you. John Ortberg says this about flourishing: “God wants to redeem you, not exchange you…inside your soul there is a battle between a flourishing self–the person you were created to be–and a languishing self.”  This involves your spirit, mind, how you spend your time, changing your daily experiences, and your relationships. We will look at each of these throughout our long look into discovering the flourishing life that we were meant to live in the upcoming weeks. For now I’ll leave you with a poem by Russell Kelfer that best sums up how special you are to God:

 “You are who you are for a reason.

You’re part of an intricate plan.

You’re a precious and perfect unique design,

Called God’s special woman or man.

 You look like you look for a reason.

Our God made no mistake.

He knit you together within the womb,

You’re just what he wanted to make.

 The parents you had were the ones He chose,

And no matter how you may feel,

They were custom-designed with God’s plan in mind,

And they bear the Master’s seal.

No, that trauma you faced was not easy.

And God wept that it hurt you so;

But it was allowed to shape your heart

So that into His likeness you’d grow.

 You are who you are for a reason,

You’re been formed by the Master’s rod.

You are who you are, beloved,

Because there is a God!”

**Next week, we’ll start a short 2 week series on vision and why it’s so vital to have vision in order to live the life we are called to live. Also a new Profile on Albert Pujols will be up by the weekend as well. God Bless.**

Sources: Rick Warren, The Purpose Driven Life. Zondervan Publishers: Grand Rapids, Michigan, 2002.

John Ortberg, The Me I Want to Be. Zondervan Publishers: Grand Rapids, Michigan, 2010.

Kerry and Chris Shook, One Month to Live. Waterbrook Press: Colorado Springs, Colorado, 2008.

Erik Rees, Only You Can be You. Howard Books: New York, New York, 2009.

Erik Rees, S.H.A.P.E. Zondervan Publishers: Grand Rapids, Michigan, 2006.